Top 10 Ways to Build Confidence

 

Have you ever looked at someone and admired how confident they are? Confidence is an ability that can be learned and with a little practice, you can overcome your fears and learn a skill which will help you all walks of life, from doing well at an interview to speaking in public. 

Here are our top 10 tips to build your confidence. 

1. Set goals and get stuff done. Accomplishing tasks either big or small will change your overall mood. Lifting your mood automatically, helps you stand prouder, even when you speak you will come across as happier and more confident.
2. Be positive and visualise. Sound simple doesn’t it? It is fact that if you have a positive outlook, your mood changes, as does the mood of everyone around you. If you take time and visualise a positive outcome of a situation, you are far more likely to succeed. Sports professionals, entertainers, public speakers etc, practice this frequently.
3. Internalise. Confidence comes from within. Really think about what confidence is and what it means to you. If you fear failure, challenge what failure would mean, how are you able to pick yourself back up again. As soon as you realise that you can bounce back with no trouble, the fear will subside.
4. Posture. Work on your posture, shoulders back, chin up, chest out. Confident people will always have great posture. Not only will you look more confident, your voice will be louder and clearer.
5. Reward yourself. Praise and recognise your achievements. If you won a big contract or got the job you wanted, celebrate your success. It doesn’t have to be anything lavish, just something that marks your achievement.
6. Appreciate yourself. It is easy to be critical of ourselves, but when did you actually sit down and think about how great you are? Grab a pen and paper and list your qualities and achievements.
7. Talk to yourself. You may feel silly doing talking to yourself, but having a dialogue with your reflection is a great way to build confidence. Tell yourself that you are amazing and confident and you can do this!
8. Live in the present. It is easy to fret about something that hasn’t even happened, which causes you stress that you don’t even need. Be in the moment and let things happen. As soon as you release the worry, you will feel lighter and more in control.
9. Practice eye contact. Next time you speak to someone be conscious of how much eye contact you hold or don’t hold. Being aware of our body language is a powerful tool to have at your disposal. We do it without even thinking and we read the signals that it gives out from others. Recognising positive body language signals will help you appear far more confident.
10. Be yourself. Our individual personalities, tell people what we are all about. You can learn to be confident, but stay true to yourself. Don’t try to be someone you are not. It is fine to aspire to be like someone but ultimately your confidence is yours to own and embrace. 

Effective Communication

Effective Communication

If you missed our very own Cat Foulkes on the ZoShow on Wednesday 28^th October, you can watch it again with this link. https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=654238222119399

If you don’t have time to watch, we have picked out some great highlights from the show here. Please feel free to contact us with any questions.

Zo: Tell us a little about yourself and your role within Birmingham International Speakers Club (BISC).

Cat: I am one of the organisers of the club, I have a job that I love and although it doesn’t involve public speaking, I would not have achieved this role if I didn’t have the effective communication skills that BISC gave me.

Zo: Public speaking is a huge skill, I had huge issues with a stutter when I was younger and had a real lack of confidence. So, I plucked up the courage to join BISC and as soon as I sat down, I knew I was in the right place. Can you explain to people who don’t know about BISC, what the club is all about?

Cat: I had a similar experience with public speaking that went terribly wrong. I went for a job that required a 20-minute presentation as part of the second round of interviews. I ended up not progressing further with the job because of the fear of public speaking. I knew that this fear would stop me from progressing with my career so I looked online and I found BISC. It’s a local club based in Birmingham and part of a global organisation. We have a clear set of procedures around public speaking, to enable anyone and everyone to become a competent public speaker, and to become a proficient communicator.

It’s a definite life skill that impacts so many parts of our lives, so I initially joined to enable me to deliver a presentation for an interview. Now, I have learnt how to structure the content of a presentation and how to deliver in an impactful manner, becoming competent in speaking whenever I am called upon. It feels so good to overcome something that was, initially debilitating and to progress further in my career. BISC has impacted all parts of my life.

Zo: Lets talk about fear. How do you overcome the fear of speaking in public?

Cat: Communication is fundamental in progressing through life. My first speech, I was absolutely petrified, I was hoping to break a leg so I wouldn’t have to go. I wasn’t really clear and confident about my content and the delivery itself was laughable. I spoke too quickly and just ran of the stage when I was finished. Because this experience was so bad, I found that every occasion after that was slightly better. So, with the positivity of the club and my own determination, I was able to progress.

There are three main points that BISC help with. The first is to know your audience, and to get the internal dialogue away from you. Think about what you are going to teach them, you are there to share information with them. Once you change the focus from you to your audience it really helps.

Secondly, practice. Practice in the shower, the car, to a line of pillows on the sofa, to a family member. The more you practice the more confident you will be with your content.

Third is to breathe. Take the time before your presentation to concentrate on your breathing, even write it in your notes to make sure you do it. Right before starting, take a deep breath and survey the room.

Zo: What are some quick tips on overcoming nerves?

Cat: Being well prepared, goes without saying. Have a positive visualisation of seeing the meeting going really well. Have someone manage the timing of your meeting to take that worry away. Most importantly. believe in yourself. If you have been asked to deliver a speech, then they are already deeming you competent. Having the self-belief that you can do it will help so much with your confidence and nerves.

Re-focus the adrenaline that you are feeling. It is the same adrenaline that you feel when you are excited, so instead of focussing on how you are feeling nervous, change it to feeling excited instead. Time to shine!

Zo: What is a typical club meeting?

Cat: Twice a month we are currently meeting online, formally face to face, and the meeting is divided into two halves. The first is typically 2-4 prepared speeches on a pre-given topic and time frame, and the second half is a workshop which is fully interactive, either delivered by a member or external guest. The topics given could be anything from a lottery win to a bank heist and it is entirely up to the individual to take the topic and run with it however they would like to.

There are two evaluations given for each speech, by more experienced members, and this is where the magic happens. You are given feedback on what went well and what to consider for next time. You get to learn your individual strengths as a speaker and often, it comes to light, things that you had never considered before. Maybe you say ummm a lot or touch your face, and once your attention is drawn to it, it makes you more conscious and able to do something about it for future presentations.

Zo: What about impromptu speaking?

Cat: I would suggest three things, think about your audience. What is the take home message that you want to give your audience? What is the one sentence that you really want to end with? Make sure that you mention why you are there and why you are addressing everyone. It could be raising a toast at a party or speaking about someone leaving a company. It is a skill and you do have to work on it, but once you do, its like riding a bike.

Zo: How do you deal with hecklers or negative members of the audience?

Cat: Address them at the end of your presentation, deal with it in a diplomatic way, without letting them disturb your flow. The main thing is, that it is your presentation, so acknowledge them and deal with their comments at an appropriate time in a way that does not derail you from your flow.

Zo: Many meetings are now been held over the internet so do you think that the world is changing in terms of switching to digital?

Cat: I think there will always be the need and desire for people to gather in a face to face auditorium to get the energy and passion that you get from a public arena. I think that learning to be a host on Zoom etc is definitely a skill in itself and we will all benefit from learning how to move to digital.

Zo: Talking about fillers in a presentation, the ummms for example. How would you suggest you tackle these?

Cat: Fillers are such an easy go to; they are the words that you use when you can’t think of what to say next instead of leaving a silence. Leaving a pause instead is actually a lot more effective, it will keep your audience’s attention without holding you back from your message. One thing we teach you is to become comfortable with holding pauses. It seems very alien at first but is very powerful, your audience will be in suspense of your next words, if used correctly.

Zo: Do you have any suggestions for anyone delivering something via digital medium?

Cat: I would suggest that meetings held on Zoom would still follow the same time management structure. Engagement is the key change. Face to face you can easily detect if someone is distracted, lost focus or they are loving what your saying. On a Zoom meeting, the way to keep engagement is to be much snappier and quicker, keep the meeting moving.

Zo: How important, now we are moving into digital delivery, that tech works?

Cat: I can’t tell you how many Zoom meetings I have been on where someone’s battery has died and the meeting has just stopped. A good hour before the meeting, check to make sure that everything is working and the battery is fine. Be prepared by checking that your background is appropriate and well lit. Check that you are a proper distance away from the camera, that the sound works etc.

Zo: For digital meetings, what is a non-aggressive way of involving those who are not participating?

Cat: There is a fine line between putting someone on the spot and trying to involve them in engaging in the meeting. I tend to make sure that everyone introduces themselves at the start so everyone knows everyone. It could be as simple as asking what they had done that morning. This involves everyone right from the get go, and it’s a bit of an icebreaker. It helps you engage everyone throughout the rest of the meeting.

Zo: What is the benefit of being able to speak in public?

Cat: Many of our members, including myself, have gone on to get promotions at work and have improved their lives dramatically. I find that I am now able to put my point across succinctly and be confident in an environment when I am put on the spot. Without effective communication we cannot succeed. In all aspects of our lives, work, relationships, friendships, we need to be able to put across our point to make sure that the recipient of our message understands. Public speaking is just the tip of the iceberg, it actually effects so much more to a person in all parts of their life.

Zo: How important is it to learn in a safe environment where you don’t feel criticized or inferior to others?

Cat: To go to a club, where your boss isn’t there and meeting other like-minded individuals who all want to grow and no one is judging is freeing. Everyone is there to encourage and support growth not to criticise. Its all about building confidence.

Zo: We’ve had some great tips here, so how do people go about visiting BISC and getting involved?

Cat: Facebook : https://facebook.com/BhamSpeakers/

LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/birmingham-international-speakers-club-3b36251b1/

Twitter: @birminghamspeakers

Website: https://bisc.powertalk.org.uk

We look forward to seeing you there!

 

 POWERtalk Pollokshields

Due to the current pandemic POWERtalk Pollokshields have been meeting via Zoom.  This has proved to be very successful and the members have enjoyed lively meetings.   On Wednesday 14th October the club met at 7.30 pm.  The Theme for the evening was "The World is your Oyster - or is it?"    President Brendan opened the meeting and introduced Roz as Chair for the evening.   The topics were taken by Louise, Grace,Liz and Scilla.  A very entertaining Education/Fun session followed by Carole Ford introducing a shared Screen and a lively Quiz.  The two speakers were Anita - "Pearls of Wisdom" and Brendan on "Is the Future Google?"  A useful General Evaluation was given by Grace and the Timing and Vote of Thanks was given by Liz.  Members are really enjoying the Zoom Meetings which gives us an opportunity to continue with the club in these very difficult times.

The next meeting is on 28th October and the Theme will be "Sights and sounds and smells".

Top 15 tips to enhance your Zoom meetings

 

Top 15 tips to enhance your Zoom meetings

Zoom has quickly become the most popular tool to keep us connected during Covid-19, especially in a professional capacity. We have adapted well to running and joining meetings at home even with the worry of invasion from the kids, the cat sitting on your laptop or the dog deciding it’s a good time to pee on the carpet. Even when we finally go back to offices, the popularity of Zoom meetings will continue, as we realise that there is no longer the need to bring everyone together for a meeting in an office environment and can just as easily be done remotely. More and more people will also be given the opportunity to continue to work from home.  So, Zoom is here to stay! Here are some great tips to help you when running or attending meetings.

1.      Add a background – Zoom offers a selection of backgrounds to use or upload one of your own. Just go into settings and get creative. If you don’t want to use a background then have a plain wall behind you.

2.      Light up- Being in a well-lit area or having a light facing you will highlight your face. You can easily use a lamp or with a small investment, buy an LED ring light.

3.      Level up – Have your camera at the correct level. You don’t want to be looking down or up at your screen. If you need to sit your laptop on a pile of books to get the correct level then that’s fine. No one can see what you are using. Your picture will be a lot more flattering and clearer to anyone watching.

4.      Mute and unmute quickly – It can be very distracting if everyone is off mute throughout a meeting. Having everyone mute other than the speaker is wise. If you need to unmute quickly, simply hold the space bar down while you talk and release it when you have finished.

5.      No need to add video when you join a meeting – When you join a meeting, generally there is a period of time when you are waiting for others to join. There is no need to activate video straight away. Wait until the meeting is about to begin before opening the video option.

6.      Change up the screen – Use Gallery View so you can see everyone in the meeting.

7.      Sending invites – Send well ahead of time with a follow up reminder. Often Zoom meetings fail purely because they are badly organised.

8.      Share Screen – This enables you to do presentations or demonstrations to everyone at the same time. Both the co-ordinator of the meeting and the attendees are able to share their screen.

9.      Zoom App Market Place – Through these apps which integrates with Microsoft Teams and your google or outlook calendar, making the whole experience with Zoom a lot more seamless.

10.   Recording your meetings – There are two levels of being able to record your meetings. Zooms free level enables you to record your meeting locally onto your hard drive, whereas the paid Zoom level will allow you to save to the cloud.

11.  Enhance your look – Zoom offers you the chance to soften your features. (Settings -> Video -> turn on Touch up my appearance)

12.  Audio Transcript – The paid version of Zoom lets gives you the option to have an audio transcript of your meetings, found under advanced cloud recording settings.

13.  Waiting Room – It is a good idea to enable this feature as hackers or strangers could be attending your meeting without permission or an invite. Using waiting room lets you see exactly who is in attendance and who shouldn’t be. This can avoid an embarrassing situation during a meeting.

14.  Break out rooms – If you have a large number of attendees you can set up to 50 break out rooms for workshops or mini meetings.

15.  Practice – Arrange with a friend or colleague a dummy meeting to test out the Zoom features and to get the level and lighting right.

ITC – An Education!

How I found out about the Scottish Colourists

 

In the pre Covid times, I always enjoyed my annual visit as Region Board member to Caledonia Council meetings.  

Portrait of Grace McColl by J D Fergusson

Who would not enjoy being royally entertained by old friends? I always arrived on the Saturday evening, had a splendid meal provided by my host for the weekend, then a full breakfast on the Sunday morning, and so on to the Redhurst Hotel for the Council Meeting. On one memorable occasion, I was seated comfortably enough, and from somewhere I could hear the sound of the staff preparing to serve Sunday dinner. “I’m still full from breakfast!” I began to think, when, suddenly, I found myself on the edge of my seat, almost startled. I had hardly noticed from the programme that the last event of the morning was to be “The Scottish Colourists”, but Brendan had commenced a talk and was projecting a stunning sequence of paintings onto a screen. I was surprised because, although art has always interested me, I had never heard of this group, and had never seen any of these paintings, before.

 
The Colourists were Samuel Peploe, John Fergusson, George Hunter and Francis Cadell. They were at their height between 1900 and 1930 and were very much the heirs of the French Impressionists of the nineteenth century. The name came to be applied to them because of their “use of brilliant colour to capture the rich evocation of a place or person”. What were their subjects? To continue to quote from Dr Cummings of Edinburgh University, “whether a landscape, a portrait, a still life or a subject celebrating the vibrancy of urban life, [they] convey a real sense of joie de vivre which few can match”. It’s difficult for the layman to add to that. A large part of their attraction is that they are capable of being appreciated by anyone: the viewer can simply enjoy the use of colour and not try and guess any “hidden meaning”. Confident in their own Scottishness, they spent a lot of time in France, where the sunshine gives plenty of scope for the artist. Several of their paintings were purchased for the French nation.

Disgracefully, I am not aware of any of their work being on display in any of the major English galleries, and would be very happy to be proved wrong. If you want to see more, and I hope that this very brief introduction has whetted your appetite, then the National Galleries of Scotland have some fantastic exhibitions from time to time. 

Colin Gray

 

 

Body Language – The unspoken communicator

 

Body Language – The unspoken communicator

Body language is our non-verbal way of expressing our thoughts and feelings. We gesture with our body and use facial expressions without even realising it. Being aware of how we use our body language is a powerful tool when it comes to the art of negotiation and persuasion and will help fully engage your listener/s.

Once you learn how to use your body language, you will naturally be able to read others which will help you gauge situations quickly and adjust your behaviour as necessary. This is great in meetings especially if you are needing to really capture the attention of who you are talking to.

Here are some top tips to consider when you are in your next meeting or giving your next presentation or speech.

1.      Use open body language – make sure your arms are unfolded and your hands are unclenched. This shows the listener that you are being open and will help convey honesty and integrity. If you have to deliver bad news or face a difficult meeting where there is the potential of a sticky situation, you will most likely see your audience with arms crossed, facing away from you and not making eye contact. If you mirror their behaviour then you will hit a stalemate. By showing you are open allows them to feel more at ease and they are far more likely to engage.

2.      Make eye contact – No matter if you are speaking to one person, a few people or a whole room full of people, eye contact is important. Of course, there is a fine balance between holding eye contact with the same person for too long and not holding it for long enough. Too long and you are in a creepy staring match, not long enough will make you appear disengaged. A few seconds at a time is more than adequate. If you speaking to a room full of people then pick out people left, right and centre and alternate every few seconds.

3.      Avoid touching your face and fidgeting – If you frequently touch your face or fidget you will come across as being uncomfortable, untrustworthy, dishonest and shifty. It really won’t matter how great your subject is if you let your body language contradict what you are talking about.

4.      Use open hand gestures – Be careful to not overdo the gestures with your hands, this can be distracting from what you are saying. Having your hands opened palmed will convey openness, sharing and trust. Unless you are putting across a serious issue and it is intentional. Never point, this will show aggression and will turn your audience right off.

5.      Smile – Unless you are delivering bad news of course! The simple act of smiling will show warmth and trustworthiness. Your audience will be put at ease and feel more relaxed and open. Smiling changes your whole persona and has a knock-on effect, if you are smiling you tend to make others smile. Much like how a yawn is contagious.

6.      Posture – If you are standing to give a presentation or speech, stand with your shoulders back and chin up, this will convey confidence and also frees your diaphragm which will help to keep your voice loud and clear.

Bonus Tip: Film yourself giving your presentation or speech so you can see how you are gesturing, the facial expressions you are making, and any bad habits you may be displaying without even realising it. Most of us are self-critical when watching ourselves back on film, so try not to be too hard on yourself.

 

Written by Sarah English for Birmingham Speakers Club - 08 September 2020.

Top tips to calm your nerves when giving a speech

Giving a speech requires preparation, from research and planning to writing and rehearsing, but failing to prepare mentally can mean the difference between a good speech and a great speech.

Controlling your nerves requires a little practice and patience, but once perfected it can be used for all sorts of situations. Here are some great tips to get you started.

Accept your nervousness and feel okay about it.  If you make a conscious effort to identify that you feel worried, that you feel queasy, that you are sweating and understand that your nerves are doing this, you are able to then accept that feeling nervous is natural and absolutely okay.

Don’t put pressure on yourself to be perfect. We often compare ourselves to others and put pressure on ourselves to be perfect but you are far better off being yourself. Even the most established of speakers make the odd mistake and that’s what makes us all human.

Know your subject matter. It is evident very quickly if you are talking about a subject that you know little about. The speech come across as lacklustre and wooden with lack of passion and conviction, your audience won’t engage and your speech will soon be forgotten. The more you know about your subject the more confident you will be.

Engage your audience. Involve your audience so they feel a part of your speech. Not only will it raise the energy level of the room, your speech will be far more memorable.

Use breathing techniques. Controlling your breathing will bring your heart rate down and help you to focus. Sit or stand straight and slowly take in a deep breath from your diaphragm to expand your tummy as full as you can. Hold for a few seconds exhale slowly as far as you can, hold for a couple of seconds and repeat. You will instantly feel calmer and in control.

Practice mindfulness and meditation. Mindfulness is the art of being in the moment, not letting any outside influences in, any worry or problems, questions or noises. It is clearing your mind enough to blank out everything and listen to your own heartbeat and breathing and nothing else. Mindfulness and meditation take practice and patience; there are plenty of guides, YouTube sessions and books out there to help you learn.

Visualisation. Visualise the success of your speech. Imagine getting to the end knowing that you were concise, clear, engaging and interesting. So much so, that your audience applauds loudly and you know that all your preparation and practice was all worth it and more importantly, you enjoyed delivering your speech.

Practice out loud. When preparing to deliver a speech you should always rehearse it out loud and in front of a friend or family member. That way, not only are you practicing, you can get open and honest feedback on your delivery and content.

Avoid stimulants such as caffeine or alcohol. The last thing your body needs is extra stimulants when your adrenaline is taking over. You may think a drink beforehand will calm your nerves but in actual fact it has the opposite effect and will only add to your anxiety. Only drink water, your body and mind work so much better when hydrated.

Make eye contact with your audience. It can be very tempting to read from que cards or your PowerPoint presentation without really looking at your audience, but will show lack of willing to engage with your audience and will turn them off what you are trying to say. Try to hold eye contact across the room by alternating to your left, right and centre audience.

By following these techniques, you will soon be on the way to delivering great speeches and actually enjoy giving them!

 

 

 

BISC on Zoom

Birmingham International Speakers (BISC) held only their second Zoom based meeting on Wednesday 10th June with coaching and tips on speeches of persuasion.

We consider public speaking as involving relatively new communication skills but we went back as far as Aristotle to understand the power of crafted speeches, especially if you want the listeners to agree with a point of view.

Some 12 members attended and we also welcomed several guests.

Aristotle at the Academy

Aristotle’s “Three Musketeers” for the persuasive speaker are logos, pathos and ethos. That is, the appeal to reason, the appeal to emotion and the appeal based on the moral character of the speaker, respectively.

The success of Aristotle’s techniques may be judged by the fact that his work Rhetoric remained the standard text on the subject for centuries. Or perhaps it may be judged by the achievements of his pupil Alexander, whose leadership skills enabled him to conquer most of the then known world.

We cannot promise to help you build an empire but we can help you to build your confidence and develop your leadership skills.

The POWERtalk Great Britain Blog is listed on the Top 10 UK Public Speaking Blogs.

If you are interested in finding out more about BISC fill out our query form.

POWERtalk Pollokshields — Dance

Wednesday 19th February. 2020  in Hutchesons' Grammar School - Room A21.

 The evening was opened by President Brendan who gave apologies from three members and introduced 

 Roz who was the chairman for the evening.   Roz gave an inspiration and topics were given to Grace, Liz, Louise, Brendan and Regina.   Brendan handed out a quiz about Dance which caused much discussion and laughter.   Following the Tea interval two speeches were given   

 One by Grace on a Hungarian Dance she did at school and

 Lauren on the importance of dance lessons for the young.

 Regina evaluated the speech by Grace and Louise the speech by Lauren.

A short business meeting was then held to discuss the Caledonia Council Speech Contest and to make arrangements for the Club Speech Contest at the next meeting.

The General Evaluation was given by Ruth and the Vote of Thanks and Timing was by Liz.

A very happy and informative evening was had by all.

The next meeting is on 4th March in Hutchesons' Grammar School - room A21 and is the Club Speech Contest to which all are welcome.

POWERtalk Pollokshields — Fashion

5th February 2020

The evening was opened by President Brendan who introduced the Theme "Fashion" with a recording of the Kinks "Dedicated follower of Fashion" and had everyone singing.

Everyone was made welcome to the first meeting of 2020.  Unfortunately, there were a number of apologies which meant that various members had two assignments.

Brendan introduced Louise

who gave us an interesting Inspiration and gave out Topics such as Liz on Burns (not a fan), Roz on fashion who gave us a quote from an Editor of Vogue "Fashion can be bought, but Style you must possess), Regina on a quote from Marilyn Munroe on the right kind of shoes, Brendan on TV programme fashion - Pottery" and

 finally, Grace who was asked about fashion which caused dogs to be bred for fashion - she did not like the topic and cleverly talked about jewellery fashion.

The Education/ Fun item was by Regina

This took the form of a most entertaining Quiz covering many areas of fashion.   The winner was Brendan.
Following the tea break, the two speakers were introduced

 Roz who took us through the ages with fashion and gave us sensible advice at the end.

Carole who led us through a number of areas of life which was fashion-led and told us about a jumper which she has knitted which was on the catwalk during London Fashion Week.

The evaluations were by Grace and Brendan.

A short Business Meeting then took place and items discussed were the Council and Club Speech Contest and club dues.

The Timing was by Carole and the General Evaluation and Vote of Thanks was by Liz.

A most enjoyable evening was had by all.

Date of the next meeting:   19th February 2020 in Hutchesons' Grammar School and the Theme will be Dance.